Updated: Jun 13
You know what it looks like. You see it on the people you admire. That look of self-assurance and confidence. And you might think to yourself.... How do they do that?
How do they look so confident when I am sitting over here, worried what everyone else is thinking about me?
The truth is that if you lack confidence, you are less likely to take action on the things you may want to try or the goals you want to reach.
Self Confidence is really about your own belief in how good you are at something. When you have a high sense of confidence it leads to more chances to improve that skill.
So, how do you go about improving your confidence?
Since it's the New Year, we will start where everyone starts the new year.... On the skill of getting better in shape. Exercise can be a huge boost to your self-confidence. Studies have shown that exercise will help improve your mood as well as help combat both depression and anxiety. The trick is that you must commit to working out regularly. And when you accomplish that small goal of hitting the gym or workout at home on a regular schedule your confidence improves because your skill set is growing. Not, to mention your body is feeling better and stronger.
Try Something New
Okay, maybe not sky diving unless you're really into that but trying something new and challenging can really build your confidence. Because confidence is really about being comfortable in a wide variety of situations. Imagine being able to walk into any situation that made most people feel uncomfortable and have the courage to be calm and take it on. When you practice getting out of your comfort zone each day, your ability to stretch yourself grows and your confidence grows along with it. So, if something like talking to someone new is a really big challenge for you start small. Say, "Hello" to the person in front of you while getting coffee. This act may seem small, but it is a step in the right direction.
Silence Your Mind Monster
A mind monster is a nasty little voice inside your head that tells you lies. It makes you think that all that you have accomplished is not enough. That you are not enough. This happens sometimes due to past trauma or just from our childhood. Things our parents or teachers said to us that have stuck with us over the years. In my sessions with my clients, I give the many different tools to deal with their critical mind monster. One of favorites is the success jar or journal. Every time that you do something big or small that you feel proud of you write it down and put it in the jar or journal. Then when you are feeling low, you go to the journal or jar and pull out one of your accomplishments. Read it out loud and be reminded of your success.
Top Tip: Don't be picky about what you put in the jar or journal. If it made you feel good, then it goes in the journal or jar.
Dress to Impress
We all have that favorite outfit. The one that makes feel beautiful, sexy or attractive. When we put it on, we smile from ear to ear and a wave of confidence washes over us. This is how you should dress every day. When I say dress to impress, I don't mean dress to impress others. I mean dress to impress yourself. Buy clothes that fit you perfectly. Throw out the old jeans that you are hoping to fit into one day. And enjoy the body you have now. And yes, you can still try to lose weight and get in shape. In the meantime, while you are working on that goal, you can enjoy the amazing body you have and dress with confidence now.